Where have you been?

I did not mean for more than a week to pass between posts here on the blog...but it happened. 

I've been living life. What have you been up to? 

A few years ago someone asked me what I planned to do when the girls had both graduated and I was finished homeschooling? I jokingly answered "nothing for at least six months." My husband said "maybe six days." 

Finishing one season of your life and moving into the next is sometimes simple, and other times quite complex. I would have to say that this transition period has been rather simple, and I am so very thankful for that! 

A lot of small changes have added up to make some big differences. I've switched day jobs, and that has been so refreshing! The family is starting to realize that we won't all always be home for dinner, and that is okay. Also, it is a good thing that spring is turning into summer soon because we've been having dinner around 7 p.m. lately, so hooray for later sunsets!

I've also taken some time for reflection. That has not happened much along the way for the past few years. With this reflection has come an incurable urge to purge things from our home. That means last week Arlene and I spent all of our days off getting things out of the house. To me, that was much more important than writing a post just to have written one. I hope you'll understand. :)

What happens next? Some home improvement projects, more purging, and a lot of fun adventures! Spring is my favorite time of year, even if the rain occasionally makes you change your plans. 

In June I am blocking out additional time for writing my book. There may not be as many posts here as there were in the past, or there may be just as many because I need a diversion - we will just have to wait and see. 

In the meantime, I wanted to share with you a post that a friend sent me. This mom writer nailed how so many of us feel at this time of the year - spread thin and worn out. To all you other middle season mama's out there - hold on - summer is right around the corner! Find it here

One day soon, probably sooner than you think, those teens and tweens will be grown up. They'll have their own cars, their own jobs, and their own true friends. They will also start buying their own movie tickets and their own groceries. Cherish the long days that you have now with them!

Big Mama hugs to you all!

My Picture My Story ~ West Baden Springs

another look back at life through a picture

Today's look back is from May of this year. The girls and I were headed to southern Indiana for a friends' graduation open house. While mapping out our route, we realized that we would only be about half an hour from the historic hotel at West Baden Springs. Simply put - our road trip took on another stop or two. :)

I love my kids, and their friends. They keep me young and remind me to find  joy in the everyday things of life. Since Arlene will be graduating soon, I decided to try to take at least one selfie with her each month of her senior year-ish of high school. Well, this was one of those times when she said "Here Mom, give me the phone, my arms are longer." This picture was taken near the end of our detour to West Baden. We planned an extra hour or so for this part of the trip. The girls and I had read a lot about the restoration work that had gone on at the West Baden Springs hotel over the past 20 years, and we wanted to take a step back in time and think about what it would have been like in its heyday in the 1920's.

Since we were headed for a graduation open house later that day, we planned to stop early and pick up one of their other friends along the way. Their friend Zed is about as chill as they come. He enjoys life, and likes mostly everybody, so off the four of us went to peek back into the 1920's lifestyle of the rich at West Baden. 

We were not disappointed! The hotel is a great place to stay (or so I've been told by friends!) and welcomes day visitors to the restaurant, gift shops, spa, and golf course, so we blended right in - LOL! We never really blend in, we just don't mind sticking out. :)

The mosaic work in the lobby floor was amazing, the open atrium was a feat of engineering, and the detail work on the furniture was inspiring. We took time to look around the gardens some as well. The great thing about exploring somewhere new is doing it with friends, so you have someone to reminisce with later. :) I am so thankful to be able to call our daughters friends.

I would really like to return again next year and spend a couple of nights as a guest at the hotel. I think it would make a great spot for a writing retreat! Let me know if any of you want to underwrite my trip ;)

The graduation open house? It was fun too! But that is a story for another picture to tell.

If you would like to see more of our trip to West Baden, check out the pictures on our Instagram page!

How to Be a Friend Through the Chaos ~ Guest post by Kimberly Dewberry

Today we welcome Kimberly Dewberry who graciously wrote this guest post. 

I asked Kimberly if she would share from her heart about how to be a true friend in challenging times. 

Be encouraged! 

Carol :)

I have a friend in my life I can turn to no matter what I am struggling with. She is there for me to spout my anger to, cry on her shoulder, and share laughter. It is so important to have that one person in your life that you know in the core of your being would—drive through pouring down rain, over thirty miles, at midnight—just to be there for you because you are hurting.

So how do you know if you are being that friend in the midst of your friend’s chaotic moments of life? We all have them. Those times when your nerve endings are on fire and you are about to pull your hair out. Those times when your husband has betrayed you or your children are going down a path of destruction and there is nothing you can do.

God addresses this topic in several places of the Bible. Here are a few that help guide us in being that friend that will help through the chaos.

Encouragement

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up as you are already doing.” - 1 Thessalonians 5:11 CSB. In this passage, Paul is addressing the church of Thessalonica. Paul wrote this letter out of his concern for the new believers and the paths some of them were going down. Paul was emphasizing the importance of encouragement of each other. Some of the Thessalonians were being attacked spiritually by Satan and as a result, their friendships with one another were strained. I believe God is telling us if our friends come to us with a great need, we are to encourage them and build them up with Scripture. Point them back to what the Word says regarding whatever they are facing in the middle of their storm. Let your friend know she is being prayed for. I don’t know about you, but when I know I have people praying for me, I feel loved.

Kindness

“Oil and incense bring joy to the heart, and the sweetness of a friend is better than self-counsel.” - Proverbs 27:9 CSB. Sometimes all we really need is kindness from a friend. There is a time and place for truth in love, but depending on the wound your friend may already have, maybe just mere kind words is all she needs in that moment. Then again, maybe its just a listening ear. Hearing and listening are often confused. Effective listening starts with undivided attention, has no words in between, and often ends with a good cry. This can be the deepest form of kindness to a friend in need.

Companionship

“Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts. For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up.” - Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 CSB. I have many friends, but only one in my life right now I would call a companion. I don’t see her every day, but I don’t have to. I know she is only a phone call away and she knows the same thing. This is the companionship the author of Ecclesiastes is speaking of. When one falls, the other lifts her up. I view this as both literal and figurative lifting up. As I mentioned before, lifting up prayer for your friend in need can be the most powerful and impactful thing that can be done. The power of prayer is undeniable. God moves mountains at the mere sound of His voice. He pulled David from the den of lions by divine protection. He is powerful and when we pray, those prayers are heard.

Just like marriage, friendship also comes with its challenges. We are busy people and we cannot be everything to everyone, BUT it is important to have that one friend and BE that one friend. The one who can encourage, show kindness, and be a companion for life.

As Jesus said, “For where two or three are gathered together in my name, I am there among them.” - Matthew 18:20

Kimberly Dewberry struggled for 25 years to cope with the pain, hurt, guilt, regret, unworthiness, and shame caused by her addicted father. As her life devolved into a predictable pattern of poor choices caused by the dysfunctional thinking of an alcoholic household, Kimberly’s image of God was skewed with an inner turmoil that only he could heal. Through the loving grace of Jesus Christ, she has broken free from the shackles of rebellion and anger and has made it her life’s mission to openly share her journey through courageous prose. Her heart’s desire is to help other adult children of alcoholics identify and overcome unhealthy cycles of destructive living that the spectre of alcoholism leaves behind. Kimberly often speaks at recovery meetings about how the serenity and peace of God’s redemption are keys to personal wholeness. She also shares biblical insights to everyday problems through her blog, Transforming Normal. Kimberly has two grown children. She and her husband Patrick live in the Dallas area with their two furry friends. Kimberly enjoys writing, reading, Bible art journaling, participating in Bible studies, and dating her husband.

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