Back to College lessons

 For the past eight weeks I have been hard at work learning something new - or rather - lots of new things!

I am woefully behind on sharing reviews of books I have read, but I hope to remedy that some next week on fall break. What has kept me occupied? College classes! Yes, after more than 20 years, I made the decision to head back to college to get a business degree. It has been a wild and crazy ride so far.

I've had fun (mostly) learning how to use PowerPoint, and I can report that I passed my MicroSoft certification exam for PowerPoint yesterday! Huzzah! Also on the schedule these first eight weeks was a class on Team Dynamics. Oh my! So many things to think about with this one. It had me asking various people I know in different areas of the business world for help and mentoring. I learned SO MUCH, and yet, it taught me I have a whole lot more to learn!

What else has kept my days and evenings full? Two weeks ago I started a new, full-time job at Conner Prairie in the Facilities department - but, lest anything be too easy in my life - I am still working my scheduled days in Guest Services until the end of the month. One of my co-workers asked me today if I feel like I'm "trying to drink from the fire hose"? Um, yes. 

So many things to learn. I am so, so very thankful for the patience of my new boss(es) and the others in the department who have gone out of their way to make my transition as easy as possible. :)

Life is an adventure, this past month has been a whirlwind, and I am looking forward to what comes next. It might be another eight weeks before I get back on here to post an update, so feel free to ride along with me on my adventure by checking out my Instagram posts.

May your fall season bring joy, peace, purpose - and lots of Jesus!

time for reflection

Taking time for reflection or introspection is hard work. Some of my friends journal every day, others - not at all. I fall somewhere in the middle. Whether we think, pray, meditate, draw, create, journal or do something else entirely, we need to set aside time to reflect - and then adjust our lives if needed - regularly.

A few weeks ago our pastor said something like this: ‘don’t think you have to be broken to go to counseling, we all need counseling.’ I’ll add on that we are all in some measure cracked, broken, or unsure. Maybe you won’t feel compelled to go see a pastor or counsellor after your self-reflection time, but might you seek out a trusted friend and talk things through? We are meant to live in community, not in isolation. Is anyone else missing their in-person community during this time of social distancing to try to slow the speed of the corona virus, or is it just me?

A few days ago I spent about an hour on the phone with a good friend. We were talking about the struggle to find a new normal, a routine of sorts to structure our days and weeks since our normal activities have been cancelled, postponed, or moved online. Our church has been really good about having regular facebook live events in addition to streaming our weekly services. This is helpful, but I miss seeing people and interacting face to face. I miss the presence of other people.

Have you encountered something similar? A struggle to find your rhythm? I think that’s okay - even expected right now. Some days I wake up energized, ready to clean a closet or go outside and work in my garden. Other days I just want to curl up alone, with a book or a movie. My moods and aspirations change often. Your probably do too.

I am grounded through all of this by the knowledge that the same God who carried my grandparents through the 1918 influenza epidemic and the Great Depression is still here guiding me today.

When we take time to reflect, we find different challenges on different levels. Some days all your reflection may prompt you to do is wash a load of laundry or bake some cookies. Other days you will dig deeper. Like when I got to 1 Corinthians 13 in my Bible reading earlier this month. I don’t want to be a noisy gong, be nothing, or gain nothing. That prompted me to take a deeper look at all the times recently when i have not been loving towards my family. I’ve been feeling a little off-centered since then. Good thing I’m a lump of clay that the Master Potter can re-center.

If you’re feeling a little off-balance too, I encourage you to go to God and ask Hi to help you too.

Life is too short to not live it. Spend a little time reflecting on where you are today. Then ask God where He wants you to be.

Lent

Many people think of Lent as a Catholic observance, if they think of it at all. Perhaps they only know it as that thing that happens after Fat Tuesday and Mardi Gras. Lent has been observed in both Catholic and Protestant churches as a time of reflection and preparation before Easter. Most scholars agree that Lent in its traditional sense began around 325 A.D. after the Council of Nicea.

Most of today's Evangelical churches rarely observe Lent. I personally see it as more of an individual choice, because it is more about the inner workings of your Christian life than about the outward observation of the season before Easter.

I grew up in a denominational church that observed Lent, but not as deeply as my friends who grew up Catholic did. It has left me with a unique perspective. While my Christian faith is much more about my daily walk with Jesus than about the outward show of religion, I find both comfort and challenge in the liturgy of church history and worship.

What does it mean to me to observe Lent as a Protestant, and how might this become something beneficial to all of us? That's what I'm hoping to share today.

Traditionally Lent is seen as the season of giving up: sweets, movies, bad habits and the like. But while these can be a positive step towards a deeper walk with God, if they only last for the 40 days/ six weeks of Lent what good are they to us? I prefer to look at Lent as a season to start something new and beneficial in my life. It is a time to create good habits that can continue long after the Easter Sunday celebration is over.

What might Lent look like?

Making daily time to read my Bible - every single day, not just more days than not. 

Choosing to hand-write out a verse that God used to speak to me from that day's reading.

Writing an encouraging note to a friend or a co-worker.

Making the best choice for my lunch selection out of my available options.

Choosing to spend more time listening to my kids than talking at them.

Taking a walk every evening and spending that time in prayer for others.

These are just a few of the things I've done, or seen others do, during Lent in recent years. 

Right now a pretty popular Lenten practice is 40 bags in 40 days. It is the idea of purging out the things you don't need from your home and giving the ones that still have value to those in need. It sounds like a great idea to me. Can you imagine if you had 40 bags' less stuff in your home when it came time to clean the week before Easter?

Since we've already been purging for the past two months, we might not come up with 40 bags' worth - but I think it's worth a try anyway. Getting rid of unused things and donating the good we find can remind us of Jesus' commands to love one another and care for those in need. As you clean you can thank God for His provision of what you truly need, and ask Him to bless those who will receive your extra: clothes, toys, books, etc.

The practice of Lent is about drawing closer to God, reflecting on His sacrifice through Jesus, and allowing Him to work in our hearts. It's about letting God direct our paths for each day, whether that means volunteering more in your community, saying a kind word to a co-worker, or drinking more water to improve your health. It is something we do without drawing a lot of attention to ourselves, because it traditionally points to Jesus' 40 days of fasting in the wilderness.

Lent is not about sorrow, but about trust.

Can you set aside a little extra time each day for the next six weeks for God? Will you prayerfully consider what He might be calling you to give up or begin as a way to draw closer to Him, to understand His will? If yes, then Lent sounds like a great time to start. 

Don't spend this time worried about what you have not done in your life, but instead, focus on what Jesus has already done for you. Think about His mercy and forgiveness. Think about His grace and sacrifice on the cross for us. Ask God to help you follow His example of service to others.

For the next 40 days, and beyond:

Walk, in His steps.

1 Peter 2:21

Community - part 1

What first comes to mind when you hear the word community?


No really, I'll wait for you to think about it...








Are you thinking of a beach-front community? You know, the way a realtor advertises a house or condo to make it more attractive by labeling it "part of a beach-front community."

Or maybe you're thinking about that line you hear at church " a community of believers."


Something else?


What would you have thought when you were 10 or 12 years old? Would you have had any idea what to say if your Grandma asked you about a community?

Our definitions in our head are often different than those in the dictionary. In high school I learned that this was the word's connotation (what we think of) instead of its denotation (what the dictionary says.)

Our ideas about a word (connotation), often change as we get older. Funny that. The dictionary definitions (denotations) often change over time too. Words that were used often 200 years ago are now labeled as archaic, or do not even get space in modern dictionaries. Many people would rather look at a website like Wikipedia than pull out an actual dictionary or encyclopedia. I'm not opposed to using either, but I'm more likely to put stock in what the book says over what the collective internet users say - shocking right?!

My modern dictionary says this about community: a group of people living in the same place or having a particular characteristic in common

My reprint of Noah Webster's 1828 dictionary said this: a society of people having common rights and privileges, or common interests, civil, political, or ecclesiastical 

So which would you rather belong to, a beach front community, senior community, a gated or farm community? That's what the modern definition seems to imply. Community means living in the same place. Does that actually make a community? Maybe. But I think it often lacks a depth of closeness or relationships. 

I've lived in several communities in my life, in regards to a physical place. But what I think we long for is the older definition: having common interests, common rights, having a place where we belong as a person, not just as a number.

I've been writing about community this past month for my book, and it has given me pause. We take so much for granted because we hurry through this life. Where is the community you MOST want to belong to? Is it important enough for you to invest time into? Do you give to your community or only take? How can we teach another generation about the importance of true community with deep relationships and real responsibilities when we don't live in community ourselves? You cannot teach what you do not know.

It is time for us to step back and evaluate our communities, whether they be by geographical location or by common interests. How can we lift others up? How can we give back more than we take? How can we create and sustain healthy communities for ourselves and our families?

I'll be sharing some more thoughts about community as I work through it myself. In the meantime, feel free to leave a comment and tell me something you appreciate about a community you belong to!

Daily dose of nature

Hello!

If you've been wondering where I've been, the answer is: outside! I know, it's January, and I live in Indiana, so it is sometimes a real challenge, but I've been making an intentional effort to get outside more this winter.

I've been posting some of the pictures from my adventures on Instagram, using the hashtag #dailydoseofnature 

I've also been writing, but, obviously, not all for here on the blog, or you would have seen more posts -LOL! I'm working on a book, and keeping my other writing commitments.

AND...

We have been purging the house. It might not look like it yet, but we have a goal in mind to reach before spring arrives, so the girls and I have been working on one small area at a time around our other commitments.

There had definitely been a shift in the dynamics around here since Arlene started college last fall, and all four of us have felt it. It might be the hardest on my husband, because everyone has different schedules now. With four working adults in the home, it is taking us all a while to get used to the changes in meals, chores, and availability.

So how do we navigate changes in our lives? Because I am here to tell you that the seasons you went through while your children were growing up are vastly different from the other side once they've all graduated high school. Do you have plan yet? If not, may I suggest one?

Trust God.

Two words that should sum up our lives here on earth, and yet, how often we stray from this simple plan. It is simple to say, and harder to do. Trusting God requires us to let go of our perceived control on our lives and allow Him to direct our paths. 

Last week at Ladies' Bible study I commented about how God only lights our next few steps, and it is a good thing. We cannot know how He will move, prune, and refine us too far into the future or we would walk away from it. We would see that the testing will be hard and reject it, because we cannot understand the huge amounts of grace and beauty He is going to bestow upon our lives in the process. We are temporal focused, He always has an eternal focus. These hard days and nights truly are light and momentary troubles - but they sure don't feel that way when we are in the midst of them!

If our focus can be returned again and again to trusting God then we can truly rest. Not rest from living life, but rest from striving. Rest from competing, rest from worry, rest and not fear. 

Would you like to find rest for your war-weary soul? Trust God.

Would you like to find rest from financial anxieties, or marital strife? Trust God.

Would you like to be kind and loving towards others instead of bitter and cynical? Trust God.

Maturity doesn't happen at a particular age, it happens when we trust God. Each time you choose to trust God instead of striving, competing, complaining, or fighting, you will mature.

God is in the business of fresh starts. He is in the business of Love, forgiveness, and grace. He brings beauty from ashes and life from death.

When I take my daily nature walks I am looking for ways that He shows me beauty, grace, and life. I spend a lot of the time praying for friends. I want to encourage you to do the same: pray for your friends, look for beauty, grace, and life.

Even if life has knocked you down, God wants you to get back up - trust Him!

In the words of TobyMac:

You may be knocked down, but not out forever.

Happy New Year 2020!

Wishing you and your family a happy and blessed New Year!

Thank you for all of your encouragement these past eight years. There have been less posts here recently - I am writing a book, and that takes time. That doesn't mean I've forgotten about you! Look for more regularly scheduled content to appear in 2020. 

A new year, a new decade, and the same faithful God. Our lives are filled with endless possibilities. Let's choose to make them extraordinary as we look to the Author and Finisher of our faith - Jesus!

May your new year be filled with joy, peace and purpose!

Rush...

Today is the 6th of December. Are you feeling a holiday rush? Are you scrambling to figure out where, when, and with who? Or are you trying to figure out the how of your holiday season?

What if we all took a step back and decided to not rush through this holy time of year? What if we took more time reading about the birth of Christ than we spent in line at the local department store?

Rush is just one letter different than push. 

Instead of pushing yourself, and your family, through the holidays, choose to enjoy this time. Reflect on what a wonderful gift we are actually celebrating. Jesus coming to earth to take our place on the cross.

Stop

Imagine

Without the gift of Jesus we would not have anything to celebrate. We would not have hope or joy, or even purpose. But, because of Jesus we can live lives filled with hope, joy, and purpose!

This year, this week, even today - you can choose to slow down and marvel at all we have to be thankful for. There is no perfect present to be found at the store - because the perfect present has already been given. Choose to accept it, and the wonder and magic of Christmas, Jesus' birth, life, death, and resurrection will change you forever!

'For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in the manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, goodwill towards men."' ~Luke 2:11-14

enjoy

This is the last post from the 31 days of October five minute free writes. I know, it's a week late, but better late than never. I'm also not going to time this one...

One of the keys to better emotional health is learning to live your own life, and not someone else's life. This also means learning how to set boundaries so that you can effectively communicate with the people in your life. This leads to being able to have discussions about what should and should not be a part of your life. 

I cannot keep my integrity in my own life, if I allow others to dictate what they think my life should look like. It has been a long year of discovery, but I know I am on the right track. I've never been much of a journal writer, but one of my friends said that's sort of what my blog is like. To a point, yes. There are things I will not share here that might or might not go in a journal. Life is to be cherished, and that also means protecting those I love by not over-sharing here.


Today's word is enjoy.

Sounds safe enough. Here is a list, in no particular order, of things I enjoy.

A mug of good-quality hot chocolate on a cold day

Brisk walks through the autumn leaves.

A medium-well ribeye steak - oh yum!

Belonging in a small group of friends

writing

Photography, especially of nature

long walks on warm sand at the beach

quiet time by myself

flowers

more flowers

a spring walk through the woods looking for the first shoots of edible plants and the early rosettes of wildflowers

a baked potato with butter and sour cream

Listening to someone sing

Christmas - all of the lights, songs, snowflakes, and celebrating the birth of Jesus

creating art - especially with pastels, or flowers

The empty pages of a new calendar or notebook

walking hand in hand with my husband or our daughters

watching a football game

spending time with wool - dyeing, spinning, creating

Dinners with friends

long conversations and catching up chats

a real leather belt and a solid pair of boots

being warm, not being cold

eating fruits and vegetables

colored pens 

When God speaks to me through His Word

a good hug

watching the sunset

a good night's sleep

a warm blanket on a cold day

flannel sheets

Christmas Carols

helping other find joy

wearing my favorite pair of jeans

my new heated vest on a cold evening

the hush of snow

birdwatching with my husband

watching fish swim in an aquarium

target practice

making books - cutting pages and sewing covers

pumpkin pie with whipped cream 

watching a good movie with my girls

picking and arranging flowers

traveling

coming home again

the scent of lilacs

a bonfire, with s'mores

sitting by the shore of the lake, or on the beach, and hearing the waves break



What do you enjoy?

memory

What are your favorite memories?

One of mine is from our family trip out West when I was in middle school. We were staying a few days in Yellowstone, and I remember standing on the boardwalk and watching Old Faithful erupt. 

Another one is from my early childhood, like right before I turned three - and we were visiting our soon-to-be-finished house. I could sit on the floor and look out the window in the living room - it was amazing! I was little and those windows were big.

It is important that we hold on to the good memories. Some days we will be overcome by the memories of things that went wrong. If you remember the good memories they can help you get through those tougher days.

Cherish your life. Appreciate your friends. Love your family - even the ones that drive you crazy. 

You are making memories today - focus on the good that is happening around you. 

practice

It takes practice to learn how to sort through your emotions. We see so many people around us each day, and I bet we often think "wow, they don't have a very good handle on their emotions." I wonder how many people have thought that about me in the past?

So what can I do? Stop, think, sort, and try again when I fail. I also need to focus more on offering grace and less on how I think about others are behaving. This trip towards better emotional health is about me getting myself better, not about trying to fix others. There will always be struggles around me, but I am working on having less of those intense struggles within myself.

I can practice being gracious and kind. I can practice speaking the truth in love. I can practice sharing the love of Christ with those around me. I won't get it all right today, tomorrow, or next week - but I can take steps towards where I know I want to be, and where God wants me to be. 

Life is a journey, and I am taking the creative route to get there - it may not be the fastest route, but I hope it can be a joy-filled one.

test

If a test was offered to measure how emotionally healthy you are, would you take it?

What if that test brought to light things you'd been trying to hide? What if it showed you were the one with the problem and not someone else? Would you still be willing to take the test?

Let's be honest with ourselves and think about life as a daily test of our emotional health, and thus, how deeply we can delve in our walk with Christ. If our emotional health is a wreck, we cannot move forward as God wants us to. We have to fess up to our own mistakes, and then ask for help.

Maybe your life hasn't turned out how you imagined it... mine surely has not, and yet, when I came to the realization that I would not have that storybook ending, I became emotionally healthier. There are good and bad parts of marriage, of parenting, and of being a boss or an employee. When we admit that our lives, our crazy, messy, hopefully joy-filled lives, are not going to look like a movie from The Hallmark Channel then we can embrace where we are, and look to Jesus to help us move forward.

Life is more than the pictures you see on someone's social media pages, it is real, messy, and can be wonderful even in the midst of a storm. That's what happens when God takes the test for you!

better

Getting to better emotional health takes time, but it is worth the journey. At several points along the way you should experience a greater peace that was missing before.

I have learned to set boundaries, and how to say no more effectively. I also now realize that sometimes I set goals for myself that are unrealistic, and that is where I not only need to re-evaluate those goals, I need to offer myself a big ole' heap of grace!

When I said 'yes' to writing for 31 days in October, I really didn't think through how much I should prep ahead of time. That's why recently there have been sets of days where I didn't get anything posted, and then I work hard to get caught up, or at least close.

It is important to me to finish out the 31 prompts, but I'm not making any promises it will happen by the 31st. That's offering myself grace. I want to finish on time, but knowing that I will be working, and doing other activities along the way this week means being realistic.

What can you learn to be better at? I'm learning to be better at offering myself that same grace I extend to others.

accept

How can we learn to accept the situations around us that cause us pain, or that challenge our resolve to be loving and kind? 

Does accepting my current situation equal contentment? No. Contentment is deeper that acceptance. I can accept that some people will never change, that I may or may not get a promotion, or that it will rain next Wednesday. But that doesn't mean I am content with them.

Contentment is so much deeper than acceptance. It has to do with the giving up of ourselves and entrusting our present and our future to the Father who wants the best for us. That requires sacrifice. Can I truly trust that God knows what is best for my life, what will bring Him the most glory? Oh - that's a hard one to swallow some days. 

I want to walk this journey with a confidence that the same God who raised Jesus from the dead can raise me out of my grave as well. Can I turn my eyes away from the things of the world and keep them on Jesus? Oh Lord, I believe, help me overcome my unbelief!

I will accept the things I cannot change, but more importantly, I will keep on learning how to be content, safe in the presence of God, and living in newness of life.

wait

Oh! How hard it can be to wait.

Wait for dinner, wait for a job, wait for God to answer your prayers...

Are you being changed during the waiting, or are you stuck in limbo - doing nothing?

Earlier this year, when our church was focused on better emotional health and how finding that frees us to pursue God and live a life filled with peace, joy, and purpose, our pastor gave a sermon about waiting. What happens during the waiting? Is God stretching your faith? Are you growing to trust Him more? Or are you simply pushing the pause button on your life?

Life is too precious to waste the waiting time!

As I wait for Him to reveal if this is the answer He has for me, I will continue to grow, I will learn to trust, and I will open my hands joyfully for Him to fill them with peace.

different

Oh, to be different!

That has been my goal for so long I cannot remember when it started. It might have been tempting to be popular, but I really wanted to be different. It was not because I found fault with how others were living or dressing, it was because the creative bent inside of me longed to be free.

I wanted to be different. I did not fit any normal mold growing up. I still do not. Thankfully I have a few close friends who love me and all of my quirks!

Do you long to be different?

Not only do I want my life to look different, I want my soul to be different. I believe God does not want me to live an ordinary life. Rather, He desires for me to live an extraordinary life! I am still on that journey to find out what that entails...

The statistics are ordinary: I am married and we have two children. We both work, and occasionally, we save enough to go on vacation. From the outside my life might look boring - but it rarely is!

I see the beauty in the little details - that's thanks to my artist dad. I see patterns in nature and numbers - that's thanks to my mathematician mom. I can choose to meet every deadline, or ignore them all depending on which part of my quirky self is taking charge that day. Sometimes I am overwhelmed by all that goes on in my brain and need to take a break.

It's okay to be different. Being different leads to extraordinary things!

need

What to we really need?

As children we are taught that we need: air, water, food, shelter, and clothing. But is that enough? While these things may sustain our physical bodies, we are more than just bodies, we have souls, we have emotions, we have an innate need to be loved.

Too often we think about what our children need in the physical sense, but forget what they need for emotional health. As adults, we often struggle to show and receive love because we did not receive it (well or at all) as a child. Now, I have the best mom ever - but there were times when I needed her to love me in a new or different way, but I did not know how to express that need. Today I have young adult daughters. How might they need me to love them differently than when they were 5, or even when they were 15?

Our needs change, because we change. One need remains, the need to be loved - because being loved means we belong. Everyone wants to be loved. 

Don't just yearn to belong somewhere, find a way to express your need to be loved, and find those people who will accept you and love you. 

God loves each and every one of us. It is up to us to accept that love and choose to belong to Him.

sense

When you get a sense of who you want to be, or what you need to work on in your life, what do you do as your first step towards that change?

I've realized that I need to spend a lot more time in prayer about things I want to change before I actually start changing them. It's not shoot, aim, adjust, shoot - it should be aim, adjust, then fire.

So what am I praying for or about? I need to seek God's wisdom on the parts of my life, both physical and emotional where I want to see change. Instead of jumping headfirst without looking into a change, I want to be grounded in His love, seated in His presence so that I can hear when He tells me yes or no, and which way to proceed. 

There is a verse in Isaiah that I have always cherished. Even in the midst of adversity and pain, God was promising to be with the Israelites:

Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it." ~Isaiah 30:21


In order to hear that voice I have to be listening. If you're ready to change things in your life, get alone with God, be still, and wait until His voice tells you to turn to the right or the left.

person

I was not the person I wanted to be.

That was my first realization about needing to address my emotional health. Not only was I simply too busy in terms of number of activities, I was staying too busy as a coping mechanism for not dealing with tough emotions.

Something had to change, and thankfully, it was me.

I have set some boundaries, and I am no longer afraid to say no to something that sounds good in order to have time and strength for something even better.

So who do I want to be? That is the 40 million dollar question! I want to be a follower of Jesus Christ, and I want my love of God to be evident in the way I treat all other people with respect and kindness - even, and especially, those who do not treat me with respect or kindness. 

I know that God has something important for me to do - but it may not look important to you - and I'm okay with that. My husband and I often disagree - that doesn't mean I've stopped caring for him, stopped loving him - it just means we disagree.

Part of this journey to emotional health was me learning that it is okay to disagree, and to speak my mind - as long as I did it clearly and respectfully. So no, you and I may not agree on the best color of paint, whose political candidate would do the most good, or what to eat for dinner - but we can do that with grace and respect. Wouldn't it be a wonderful thing if more people learned those skills?!?

This person I'm becoming, that God is making me into, is different than I was before - and I like her!

What kind of person are you becoming?